Elena's Death
by esmtz
Summary: Elena dies without having vampire blood in her system and all Stefan can think about is how much pain he has caused his brother Damon ever since Katherine entered their lives. After Elena's death Stefan thinks that it would be better for both him and Damon if Stefan was no longer around.


By: esmtz

Stefan stood quietly with his hands in his pockets as he watched as the coffin containing Elena's body was lowered into the ground right next to her parents and Aunt Jenna. He heard the sounds of people crying making Stefan glance in their direction. Jeremy was holding tightly to his girlfriend Bonnie as he cried uncontrollably while Bonnie, who was trying to hold herself together as best as she could, tried her best to comfort him as she rubbed his back; tears slowly falling down her face.

"It's ok, Jeremy, it's ok. I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere." Bonnie told him.

Next to them was Caroline, Tyler and Matt where Caroline in particular was also crying uncontrollably as she had her arms around Tyler's back and she let her head rest on his shoulder and he had his arms around her waist as he looked at her worriedly. Matt just kept looking at Elena's coffin with a guilty look on his face.

"That should've been me who died not her." Matt said quietly but it was loud enough for Tyler and Stefan to hear.

"It's not your fault man." Tyler told him as he turned his head to look at him.

"Yeah it is. I should've been watching where I was going and Stefan shouldn't have…"

Matt clenched his hands tightly as tears fell down his face. While Tyler kept trying to convince Matt that it wasn't his fault Stefan knew that Tyler was right. It wasn't Matt's fault at all that Elena died; it was Stefan's. Elena had been his girlfriend and he knew that he should've saved her first but she had been insistent on getting him to save Matt first so in the end he did what Elena wanted him to do and now he was really regretting making that choice because not only did Elena end up dying but now his brother Damon hated him again possibly even more than before because Stefan had let Elena die. Stefan had been aware that his brother had a thing for his girlfriend but he never imagined just how strong Damon's feelings were for Elena until a few days ago when Elena died and Damon found her and Stefan at the hospital. Stefan looked past the others to see Damon standing on the other side of them refusing to look or even be anywhere near his little brother. They hadn't spoken or even seen each other since then which only made Stefan feel even worse than he already did. He felt so bad that he hasn't really eaten anything since Elena died. He's had a little bit of blood but nowhere near enough that if he had to defend himself he wouldn't be able to. While the coffin was being lowered Stefan caught himself thinking about how lifeless he had found Elena after he had saved Matt from being trapped in the truck. It was an image in his head that had been haunting him for days and he already knew that he wasn't going to be able to get rid of it anytime soon. Her eyes had been closed and one of her arms was floating in the water. Stefan remembered how he swam up to her and got her out of the seatbelt all the while noticing that she wasn't responding to the fact that he was there helping her out of the truck. Of course once he managed to get her out of the water he right away realized that she wasn't breathing and she didn't have a heartbeat so Stefan immediately brought both her and Matt to the hospital where eventually after awhile Damon finally showed up.

 _It had been a few hours since Stefan brought Elena and Matt to the hospital and Stefan just sat where he was at staring sadly at Elena's body as tears fell down his face. He wanted to say how sorry he was for not saving her but for some reason he found himself unable to say anything as he knew that this was his fault. He slowly closed his eyes when he heard Damon's voice from outside the room. He refused to even look at his brother when he finally entered the room and went towards Elena. Stefan opened his eyes and looked away from them as Damon looked at Elena in shock and completely hurt before turning on his brother in complete anger. He grabbed Stefan by his shirt and roughly pulled him up before slamming him against the closest wall._

 _"What did you do, Stefan?!" Damon growled._

 _Stefan continued to look at the ground next to him still finding himself unable to say anything. This only pissed Damon off more as he pierced Stefan's chest with his hand to grab his heart making Stefan gasp for breath._

 _"I asked you a question brother. What. Did. You. Do?" Damon asked glaring angrily at him as he started squeezing it._

 _Stefan winced as he tried to get out what he had to say._

 _"What does it look like I did?" Stefan replied as soon as he was able to get it out which only served to piss Damon off even more, "I'm sure you know most of the story by now, Damon. I know that I should've saved Elena first but-"_

 _Damon was extremely tempted to just rip his brother's heart out but he didn't do it. Instead he removed his hand from Stefan's chest and punched him hard across the face._

 _"There's absolutely no excuse for you to use to have not have saved Elena first. She was your girlfriend, Stefan! Why would you save Donovan over her?! If I had been there I would have saved her first! I couldn't care less about what would have happened to Donovan!" Damon told him._

 _"Elena didn't want me to save her first, Damon. She wanted me to save Matt so I did. I thought if I was fast enough I could save them both. I just didn't think that this was going to happen." Stefan said softly as he rubbed his cheek from where Damon had hit him and still he was unable to look his brother directly in the eyes._

 _Damon continued to look at him angrily as he once again went up to Stefan and grabbed him roughly by his shirt and pulled him closer to him; trying to get Stefan to look at him._

 _"You want to know the difference between you and me, Stefan? I didn't care about what she thought of me especially when it came to who I was willing to let die to protect her. I was always going to choose her over everyone else and now thanks to you once again you take away the one person who I really loved." Damon said making Stefan wince, "As far as I'm concerned we're done brother. I don't care if I ever see you again or not."_

 _Damon roughly pushed him back towards the wall before turning to head out the door. Stefan watched his brother leave feeling completely hurt as he heard Damon mumble something about having a worthless dick for a brother._

Stefan kept glancing at his brother who was doing nothing but staring at the area where Elena's body now lay as people started covering up the coffin with dirt. Seeing as the others were too busy crying to notice Stefan decided to leave because he really didn't feel like staying there for that long and knowing that this situation was caused because of him he really didn't want to be around the grave or around his brother so instead he started making his way back to the Wickery Bridge where the accident had happened. As he was walking away from the others he found himself thinking about what Damon had said the last time he saw him which made Stefan really think about just how much pain he had caused his brother.

'I wonder if he's even been home the last couple of days. Probably not.' Stefan thought to himself as he himself had been avoiding going back to the boarding house especially after what happened at the hospital, 'I don't blame him for hating me. I guess that's all I'll ever be to him is a worthless dick of a brother. I mean it was bad enough that I let my own girlfriend die but to think that this situation ended up exactly the same way as it did before more or less is even worse. Damon's never going to forgive me for putting him through this a second time. Yeah Elena was MY girlfriend but still I can't help but feel like that maybe she might have been better off with him instead of with me because after all Damon's never cared about anyone else except her and all I've ever been to him was just someone who was in his way. Just like before.'

Stefan loved Elena. He really did but when it came to Damon and him fighting over her it just wasn't worth it. He learned that the hard way along time ago and yet still they made the exact same mistakes this time around as they did before and frankly Stefan was getting tired of repeating past mistakes. After awhile he finally saw the bridge come into view and he made his way towards it; all the way until he found himself leaning over the railing to look down at the water. It was quiet. There were no cars driving through there currently and everything around him just looked so calm and peaceful. All he could really hear was the sound of the birds but even then Stefan's mind was dwelling too much in the past and of what happened recently to really pay attention to what he was hearing. Part of him had blamed Katherine for coming between him and Damon before but now after experiencing the same thing again with Elena Stefan realized that it wasn't Katherine's fault at all. The reason why his relationship with Damon was so bad wasn't because of Katherine or Elena. He knew deep in his heart whose fault it really was and it definitely wasn't Damon's. Stefan had taken Katherine away from Damon not only by being with her but also by getting her killed (they thought she had been killed at the time). He hadn't even thought of what Damon must have been feeling when Stefan made his brother turn. All Stefan had cared about at that time was having his brother by his side and instead of having his loving brother Damon had promised him an eternity of misery. Stefan had never once hated him for that. Instead all Stefan kept feeling was guilt and regret and now with Elena's death Stefan already knew that there was no way he could patch things up with his brother now.

"I'm so sorry, Damon for once again being the brother that you never should have had." Stefan said to himself as he looked down at his daylight ring.

Stefan was seriously thinking about taking off his daylight ring and letting the sun burn him to a crisp but he thought that, that would be too quick of a way for him to go so instead he was going to find a way to make himself suffer before he died and he knew exactly what he needed to do. Since no one else was around Stefan took off using his vampire speed and sped all the way to the boarding house to quickly grab a stake from where they kept all of their weapons. As soon as he grabbed one he sped out of the house and went to find someplace where no one could find him; at least not right away. It didn't take him long to settle on an area in the woods just outside of the town so he had no worries of someone possibly seeing what he was doing. He made sure that no one else was around first before convincing himself that this area was clear. As soon as he was sure that no one else was around he took a deep breath in and then let it out before he pulled out the stake that was in his jacket pocket and looked at it for a few seconds.

"I'm really sorry about Elena, Damon and I know that me apologizing now doesn't really matter at this point does it? I guess the only good thing that came from this is that you'll never have to see me again." Stefan said to himself thinking about how Damon's life would have been better if Stefan had never even been a part of it in the first place.

Stefan aimed the stake at his heart and with all his strength he pushed it in. He let out a loud gasp as he fell to the floor; his skin very slowly started to grey as he realized that because he hadn't had enough blood in his system he wasn't able to completely push the stake in to really damage his heart but it was enough that he was sure that he at least nicked it enough to make it bleed. He was sure that he was dying when he started seeing memories of him and Damon when they were kids to how they were before Katherine showed up to during and even after Katherine came between them and the memories went on as it showed Stefan with Lexi and then eventually he saw memories that he had with Elena and with the brother that he had known since he met Elena. Stefan hadn't realized that while he was lying there dying someone had removed the stake that was still in his chest and was desperately trying to get him to drink some of their blood.

"Dammit, Stef snap out of it and drink from me already!"

'That voice…Damon?' Stefan thought.

The memories started to fade away just as quickly as they had come when he realized that all of a sudden he was face to face with his brother who was holding his wrist out to him to get him to drink.

"…Damon? What are you…?" Stefan asked weakly realizing that he must have already swallowed at least a little bit of his brother's blood for him to be conscious right now.

"I don't have any blood bags on me at the moment so you'll just have to make do now come on hurry up and drink." Damon told him as he forced his wrist onto Stefan's mouth.

Stefan stubbornly kept his mouth shut and slowly shook his head. He may have gotten some blood from Damon but as long as he didn't get anymore from him Stefan knew that he was still on the verge of dying.

"What do you mean no? You are going to keep drinking from me even if I have to force it on you!" Damon growled as he struggled to get Stefan to drink more of his blood.

To Damon's horror he watched as the slow spread of gray started to creep up Stefan's neck and towards his face. Stefan was refusing to drink from Damon and he knew that it was working because he was starting to lose consciousness. Damon's eyes went wide in fear when he saw that he was starting to lose his brother.

"Don't you dare, Stefan! Don't you dare leave me alone like this!" Damon said before biting into his wrist again and forcefully opening Stefan's mouth with his other hand while he put his wrist on Stefan's mouth.

Stefan was much too weak to put up a fight against Damon as he felt his brother's blood go down his throat. This encouraged Stefan's vampire instincts to kick in and unable to stop himself Stefan started drinking more of Damon's blood. Damon sighed with relief when he saw Stefan's skin start to return to normal color. Once Stefan was done Damon pulled his wrist away from him and watched his brother as he slowly sat up.

"What the hell were you thinking, Stefan?!" Damon asked angrily making Stefan look at him in surprise.

Stefan just looked at him for a few seconds before sighing.

"You shouldn't have done that, Damon."

"Shouldn't have done what? Saved my baby brother from killing himself?! Did you want to die that badly?!"

"…Yeah." Stefan said quietly as he looked at the ground.

Damon looked at him completely hurt.

"Is this about what I said before because if it is then I'm sorry. You know me I was just angry that's all. I didn't actually mean-"

"This has to end, Damon." Stefan said making Damon look at him confused.

"What are you talking about, Stefan?" Damon asked.

Stefan looked at him with a serious expression on his face.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about. All the anger, the hatred. Every single mistake that we've ever made over one girl. You can't tell me that you want to continue with the way things have been going between us because lets face it I already know exactly how you feel about me ever since I took Katherine away from you. All you ever wanted was to get revenge on me by ruining my life and trying to take my girlfriend away from me. In the end do you realize what happened? We ended up in the exact same situation as we did before!" Stefan told him making Damon wince.

In truth Damon never really gave it much thought about how he and his brother had fallen for the same girl again. It was true that at first it was all about making Stefan's life miserable but after awhile Damon had truly found himself falling in love with his brother's girlfriend. Damon had always hated the fact that Stefan was always the one who was everyone's favorite so this time around he had been determined to get Elena to love him best. He hated to admit to himself that he had never once thought about what this was doing to Stefan.

"You have always hated me, Damon ever since Katherine came into the picture!" Stefan said looking at him with a completely hurt look on his face, "All this time I thought about how bad things have gotten between us since then and yes I know that it's my fault that we're like this but still ever since Elena came along and you spent more time with us I thought about how happy I was to have you around again and that maybe you had forgiven me for what I had done but now that Elena's gone I should've realized that you never forgave me. You only hung around at first because you were looking for Katherine but after awhile you ended up falling for Elena and that's why you still stuck around even after you realized that Katherine wasn't here! Is that all I'm ever going to be to you? Just someone who stood in your way and ruined your life twice?"

Damon was left speechless as he had no idea what to say to his little brother. Stefan wanted to die because he felt like he had messed up his brother's life twice and he just didn't want to be around anymore to mess it up even more.

"Just admit it, Damon. You're never going to forgive me for doing this to you again." Stefan said looking at him as tears fell down his face, "I just want you to know that I don't blame you for hating me and I'm really sorry that you ended up having me as a brother."

Damon watched as Stefan slowly stood up and backed away from him to where he could stand in the sunlight. Stefan started to take off his daylight ring but before he could get it completely off Damon got up and rushed at his brother pinning him against the closest tree. Stefan looked at him completely confused.

"What are you doing?" Stefan asked.

"Sorry little brother but I'm not going to let you kill yourself." Damon said before snapping Stefan's neck.

The next thing Stefan knew he found himself lying on something soft as he slowly started to wake up.

"You're finally waking up huh? Took you long enough."

Stefan opened his eyes as he sat up and looked around the room. He recognized immediately that he was back in his room at the boarding house and Damon was sitting on a chair right next to his bed. Stefan sighed as he turned his attention to Damon.

"There was no need for you to stop me again, Damon." Stefan told him making Damon snort.

"Like I was going to just sit there and watch you burn to death."

"Damon-"

"No, Stefan! You're my little brother. There is absolutely no way in hell that I was going to let you die!"

"There's no point in keeping me around, Damon unless…did you want to kill me yourself?"

Damon looked at him like he was seriously insane. Had things really gotten so bad that his brother thought that he wanted to kill him?

"No! Why on earth would you think that I would want to kill you?"

Stefan looked at him sadly.

"Because I got Elena killed. I figured that you would torture me first before you'd actually kill me."

Damon shook his head as he got up from the chair and took a seat next to Stefan on his bed. He looked at his brother with a serious expression on his face.

"I'll admit I'm still angry at you but not to the point of wanting to kill you." Damon told him.

Stefan snorted shaking his head not believing for a second that Damon didn't want to kill him making Damon look at him in shock and slightly hurt.

"You don't believe me?"

Stefan looked up at his brother.

"Feel free to do whatever you want to do to me, Damon. It's not like we were ever brothers to begin with."

Stefan was completely surprised by how hurt Damon looked by what he just said.

"Stefan-"

"It's the truth, Damon. Brothers don't do what we've done to each other and besides ever since Katherine came into our lives you've never cared about what happened to me so just letting you know now that if you want your chance to torture and kill me you might as well do it now because I'm seriously done with all of this." Stefan told him.

Damon couldn't believe what he was hearing. Stefan literally believed that Damon didn't care about him and that he was giving up.

"Well, Damon it looks like you win. You promised me an eternity of misery right? Well you delivered. If Elena hadn't been here you definitely wouldn't have stuck around as long as you did so I'm at least grateful for the time that I did have with you even though all you really cared about was her so thank you for at least being here." Stefan said as he got up and walked towards the door.

He wasn't going to tell Damon this but all Stefan really wanted was his brother back but he already knew that, that was never going to happen and telling him that felt like it was just a waste of time. That's what hurt Stefan the most; the fact that he destroyed his relationship with his brother and that he was unable to fix it and deep in his heart he knew that even if Elena was still alive she would never be enough to fill the void that he felt in his heart. Just as he reached the door he tried to move past it but his path was blocked by some unknown force.

"What the…?" Stefan said.

"I had Bonnie put a spell on your room so that way you couldn't leave without my say so." Damon told him as he got up and went towards his brother.

Stefan turned around to look at his brother. He was surprised to find that tears were rolling down Damon's face and that his eyes were red from being emotional. Stefan held his breath waiting to see if Damon was going to rip his heart out or do something that was going to put Stefan in incredible pain. Stefan stiffened once Damon stood right in front. Damon just looked at him sadly as he placed a hand on Stefan's shoulder making him wince. Stefan closed his eyes as he waited for Damon to pierce his chest and grab his heart. He was completely surprised when Damon didn't do it and instead he wrapped his arms around his little brother. Stefan opened his eyes in complete shock as Damon hugged him tightly.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry little brother please forgive me for being a worthless brother." Damon said.

Stefan's eyes widened in surprise not having expected to hear him apologize. He wasn't sure if Damon was only saying this because he was all Damon had left or if he actually meant it. Judging by the fact that Damon was actually crying Stefan assumed that he really meant it so instead of questioning it he simply returned the hug and enjoyed the fact that it seemed like he had his brother back.

Author's Note: It took me three nights to complete this but finally it's done. I'm hoping that this turned out ok because it's been awhile since I last saw the first three seasons of the Vampire Diaries. Anyways I hope you guys liked it if it did turn out ok and if you didn't like it or if it came out bad then I'm sorry but like I said I haven't seen the first few seasons of VD in awhile and this is only my 3rd story for the VD so yeah I'm still not so sure if I'm getting the characters right or not especially considering their background stories. I probably should have looked over previous episodes just so I could feel more confident about this story but anyways too late now. Anyways for those of you who at least read this I want to say thanks for at least giving this a shot. I still feel like I'm entering dangerous territory by writing for this show. I'm used to writing strictly for games or anime type stuff so yeah despite that I'll most likely continue to write for VD simply because I want to read more brother fics out there so yeah until next time hopefully.-esmtz


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